Grandparenting can be highly rewarding. Many
grandparents, though, unexpectedly become guardians and raise small children.
How might this responsibility affect their normal course of adult development? What
components might require transitions?
In many cultures inside
western society grandparents have become the parents of their children’s
children. For example, the crack epidemic brought to the Black communities by
the CIA rendered many fixed income Black grandparents to raise these kids because
their moms and dads were in the streets smoking the glass pipe. This was in the
80’s, and I witnessed it personally. The CIA issue you can research on how this
happened. The CIA wanted to Congress to give them money for weapons to give to
a certain country and when refused, they found the cash in cocaine in which was
funneled in the to the USA in the poorest neighborhoods. For more information on this visit this
university cite: http://wordpress.philau.edu/thevoice/2016/12/crack-the-cia-and-media-all-complicit-in-destroying-black-communities/
But I digress; In 2005,
2.5 million children were living with grandparents who were responsible for
their care. By 2015, that number had risen to 2.9 million. Child welfare officials say drug addiction, especially
to opioids, is behind much of the rise in the number of grandparents raising
their grandchildren, just as it was during the crack cocaine epidemic of the
1980s and ’90s. An estimated 2.4 million people were addicted to opioids at
last count, (PBS, 2016).
The ability to relax
and enjoy their golden years was taken away. Vacations were not available
anymore, food was hard to come by and the stress of a 65-year-old raising a 13-year-old
is devastating and can lead to early death, due to stress. The development of
the children is affected because of the huge generational gap where different
thought’s and practices change. Technology in the grandparent’s house will
usually not be as it would with their parents simply because this age group
does not see the appurtenance of a child having access to the internet.
Many components will
change as these “grand-families” take on this endeavor of raising children 3 to
4 generations behind them. Their schedules, the need to be in close contact
with schools, the need to understand the attire these kids will wear and when
to put the breaks on, and the correct discipline to put forward when facing
issues the grandparents are not familiar with.
How
would a professional counselor encourage these older guardians in their new
roles?
Counselors can do the following
to aid the grandparents in raising their grandchildren and offer these
resources:
·
HelpGuide.org
is a nonprofit site that gives grandparents resources, tools and ideas on how
to get help and make the most of raising grandchildren.
·
USA.gov is
a site that can aid them in getting financial help for the grandparents. Many are
on fixed incomes and this site is a life-saver.
·
Daily
Strength is an online community with a special online support group for
grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. This can
also help them technology they need to bond with the grandchildren.
Many other cites are
available but most of all the counselor can let them know that you do not need
to be perfect, listen to the kids, talk with them and make family time count.
Quality time is important for children and both can grow into these new roles
together. Also, let the grandparents know it is ok to feel like throwing the
towel in! We all get that way at times and it normal.
Reference:
PBS, 2016. How drug addiction led to more grandparents raising
grandchildren. Retrieved from https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/drug-adChild